Okay, so I started working again. I like it so far. Very quiet office, lots to read. But the hours are killing me. I actually LIKE getting up early. 6 AM rolls around and I hit snooze twice and pop into the shower. I got to nurse beanie this morning (yesterday she noticed I was missing around 7:30 and I was so scared I'd hit traffic while I nursed her on the couch, both nunus.) But today she snacked between snooze alarms and I got both nunus emptied before my wake up completely shower.

I like that.

What I don't like: now that I'm working, I'm seriously exhausted by 10 PM. I had to force myself to watch L&O SVU last night. I wanted to go to bed, but I couldn't because the Beanie was full of piss and vinegar. Well, not really piss and vinegar, but the happier equivalent; she was squealing with joy and touching my face and patting my nunus and saying "nigh nigh nigh" over and over again and kicking me with her little duck paddle feet. Which is what she does when she wants to play. So I had to get her dad in there to take her from me so that I could fall asleep. Even though she nods off in my arms during TV time, she's bound to wake up if I transfer her to the bed and brush my teeth. If it's late enough I can crawl in next to her and she will nurse a few sucks and sigh and completely fall asleep. Nice for me when that happens, and that's been our MO all this time. Except that happens around 11 or 12, not 10. And Ten PM is now when my body collapses under its own weight.

I despise the Ferber method, even though I've never tried it. I heard someone say that he discredited himself recently on Dr. Phil or something, but I can't find any mention of it on Google. And so...

I'm thinking about trying it.

I never thought it would come to this. Letting my baby scream.

PF will freak out if she's screaming longer than 3 minutes. I don't know if we can actually do this...

We'll have to talk about it.

Actually, having him take her from me after I've nursed her and she's not ready to crash worked just fine. He put her to bed with me when she was really out and I remember vaguely that he eventually came to bed after Leno. But only vaguely...




~Beanie's Workin' Maman

I wanted to announce that the Beanie has learned the "sympathy cough", where a baby will cough to get your attention so you say "oh poor baby, are you okay?" And she will do it over and over again. Between that and Seamas' "I have new house diarrhea, take me out ever 15 minutes to squirt" issues, I am the most sympathetic person on the planet.

Beanie also likes The Gorrilaz. It was the only thing that calmed her down today.

Hopefully this explains why mom is now drunk as a skunk. Thank you, Forest Hill Winery.




~Beanies red wino mommy